All New “Sexy-kid-renting” Craze Heats Up in Hollywood, the DNC, and Beyond

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“We’ve always known that sexy children sell,” said Hollywood’s satanic Zionist overlords, “but now, kid-renting is really the biggest thing around!”

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Indeed, according to some diabetic limbless black lesbian who teaches Harvard University’s PhD program on the Intersectionality of Ableism, Heteronormativity, and White Privilege: people of all walks will pay big bucks for products marketed with the images of sexy children—or “thrustables” as they are known in Hollywood circles.

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As to politics: while the US Democrats have rented sexy kids to excite their base of child-murdering women and pedophile men, there is no sign yet just how big the kid-renting craze may become among Republicans, who wrote the 1973 Roe v. Wade supreme court decision.

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Thrustables have religious appeal too—but there’s a catch. “Sure, kids are sexy as hell,” acknowledged orthodox Jews addicted to the taste of metzitzah b’peh, “but they are just pictures—I mean, it’s not like they have anything to cut up and suck!”

metzitzah b'peh

feed me more foreskins

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